Born in 1869, my grandfather Frank Valentine Malins was a career soldier. The Monarchs he served were Victoria, then Edward VII and shortly thereafter George V. His regiment was the Prince of Wales Own 10th Hussars. Frank, 2472 Sergeant Malins F 10th Hussars, was proud of the regiment to a fault. He was a 19th century man, autocratic beyond belief. A domineering chauvinist, he saw nothing wrong in anything he chose to do. Moreover, he was very comfortable in this role. Being in the cavalry, he was a fine horseman and was a Squadron Sergeant-Major by the turn of the century. Starting at Private, he rose from the ranks eventually earning a commission as Lieutenant and finishing his lifelong career as Captain and Adjutant. For his many years of service he received the Meritorious Service medal

In the latter part of the 19th century, the 10th Hussars were stationed in the Curragh to the West of Dublin in Ireland. It was here that Frank met Annie Sheehan, a Protestant Irish girl, my grandmother. My mother told me that during their courtship, Frank was waylaid and beaten by a member of Sinn Fein. The truth of this is questionable since Annie gave birth to her son Arthur in Newbridge County Kildare Ireland in 1896 and the Sinn Fein wasn't formed until 1905. Still Frank was, at least, attacked by an Irishman who took exception to the hated Brits messing with Irish women. The concussion he received did not deter him. Frank and Annie were wed before Art's birth. Annie bore Frank 5 children: Arthur (1896); Hugh (1897); Walter (1898); Sybil (1901); and Reg (1903). My mother reported that Edward Hugh, the second son died as a child from spasm of the glottis. My grandparents never spoke of him.

My grandmother received an even more grievous emotional blow from which she never really recovered when her first born son, Arthur Francis Valentine Malins was killed in action near Ypres Belgium on July 23, 1917. He was 21. Arthur, anxious to follow in his father's footsteps, had tried to enlist in the 10th Hussars at the outset of the Great War. He was given a 4F status meaning he was physically unfit. Still, he was able, later in the war, to enlist in the Royal Field Artillery. This was most likely due to the huge loss of life on the Western Front especially on the Somme in 1916. The British Army had a desperate need for manpower and Art wanted to do his bit.

Arhur was the lead driver on a six horse team that dragged an ammunition limber and an 18 pound field gun up to the front and then worked at keeping the gun supplied with ammunition. Arthur rode on the left hand lead horse of the team. On or about the 23rd of July 1917, a German shell exploded on the road killing the horse under him. Shrapnel entered his skull under his tin hat. He and the horse which was cut from the harness were left virtually where they fell. His body was discovered later by Australian troops. He was still alive. He passed away at an aid station while writing a last letter to his mother. Annie kept an oil painting of his grave on her living room wall to the day she died. She also kept close to her his last letter.

Walter Charles Herbert (Wally) made it into the 10th Hussars apparently to avenge his brother. He remained in after 1918 and was later stationed in India. He married his wife, Mabel Annie Florence Attfield in 1922. I always knew my aunt as Pat. Never once did I hear her called Mabel, Annie, or Florence. Pat and Wally had two children, Arthur and Val, both more than a decade older than me. The three of us constituted the entire next generation of the Malins family. Wally retired from the 10th after full service and worked for a newspaper in London. He was recalled to the 10th in 1939 and became part of the British Expeditionary Force that was sent to France. He was Captain and Quartermaster for the regiment. He barely escaped with his life when he was evacuated from St Nazaire France at the same time as Dunkirk. He never saw military service again

Sybil Kathleen (Syb) was an attractive intelligent talented woman. She had an incredible singing voice and was an exceptional pianist. She had been on the stage in London as a professional. She was at one time the soloist at the Queens Hall. Why she chose to be a mistress to Keith Kimber, I'll never know. She once told me that her father, Frank had accepted the arrangement because he was corrupted by Kimber's wealth and position and the promise of divorce and marriage. In many ways she loathed her father and in the long run men in general. She was most certainly used and abused by males. She may have been the family's disgrace but to me she was Mummy.

Reginald Leslie (Reg) apparently had health issues from birth. Uncle Reg always seemed frail to me. He was my mother's favourite and the most gentle man. He fell in love with one of his nurses, Betty. They married in 1930. They lived at 49 Hillside Avenue Streatham Hill London for the rest of their lives. They were childless.

Frank was so wrapped up in the tradition and pride of the British military that when he went to the cinema to see, "The Charge Of The Light Brigade" starring Errol Flynn he came home crying. He was a believer. The movie was a gross misrepresentation of history. The actual Charge was a catastrophic blunder enshrined within six months by the Tennyson poem that extolled the virtue of "Noble Patriotic Death" Frank clung to a rallying call heard in the movie "Onward the Tenth!" In truth the 10th Hussars were not part of the Light Brigade. The truth was irrelevant. Frank was a believer. He was not alone. There have followed countless fools who believe in the old lie called in to question by Wilfred Owen in his powerful anti-war poem "Dulce et decorum EST . It's indeed ironic that this poem was written during the conflict that took Annie Malins' beloved son Arthur's life and Owen's as well.

An old cliche states every soldier needs his war. Frank Valentine's war was the 2nd Boer War 1899-1902. Although dates are a little fuzzy It seems my mother was conceived just before he left for South Africa and Reg upon his return. The family made me aware that he was mentioned in despatches on several occasions and barely missed receiving the Victoria Cross. It went instead to another man who the troops in Frank's Squadron thought did not deserve it. I searched the despatches from the Second Boer War. What strange documents these despatches are; subjective praise for almost anything that was forwarded upward through the Officer Corps to be enshrined finally by the General Staff. Some random examples give you a feel for what these documents contain.

Captain Viscount Crichton, Royal Horse Guards, ADC, has a good head on his shoulders, and thoroughly knows his work.

Captain H Q de Pledge, ADC, 19th Hussars, is brought to notice by Lord Dundonald, as hardworking, energetic, and reliable.

Durham Light Infantry (1st Battalion)-Private L St. Clair (promoted Corporal); Lieutenant Rasbotham being killed, took command of patrol, and by his coolness and good command, drove off attack, killing one Boer and wounding two.

It is clear that the officers, mostly aristocrats and otherwise titled individuals, received most of the credit and were able to use despatches as career springboards. But the juxtaposition of praising someone for tidying the mess hall and in the next breath giving credit to a soldier who lost his life in combat makes strange reading today. Patronization flowed downward through the British Military. Obedience, conformity and supplication flowed upward. Honour was attached to rank not ability. Integrity was seen as synonymous with how well you toed the line. It appears that, in general, group dynamics in organizations hasn't changed much if at all over the last century. They were networking in the Boer War without Facebook and Twitter. Posturing and posing was as popular then as it is now.

Little can be found regarding the Malins family after Frank's return from South Africa until 1912. My mother said they lived for a time in Stratford On Avon either before or after the strange happenings in early 1912. In March the entire Malins family: Frank, Annie and children, Arthur, Walter, Sybil, and Reg boarded the steamship Tunisian and sailed for Canada. The Titanic sank in April. In May, the Malins family boarded the Tunisian again and returned to Great Britain.

It seems as his military career was coming to an end, Frank got swept up into one of the great political controversies in Britain at the time. After the 2nd Boer War, public attention was paid to the plight of ex-servicemen whose transition into civilian life was anything but easy. Many found themselves destitute. To address this issue, The Naval and Military Emigration League was founded in November 1909. It was the only British emigration society which dealt exclusively with former military personnel. Ex-servicemen were encouraged and assisted to emigrate particularly to Canada and Australia. My mother, who was 11 at the time, said they all hated the short-lived Canadian experience. There is irony here. It relates to Frank's worship of the Charge of the Light Brigade. It seems that there was indeed something he shared with the survivors of the Charge. Rudyard Kipling wrote a poem in 1890. The Last of the Light Brigade which tells of elderly survivors of the Charge visiting an aged Tennyson to chide him for not writing a sequel to show the terrible treatment of ex-servicemen of the Crimea. Kipling may have invented the visit to draw attention to the poverty in which the real survivors were living. Frank and family were indeed facing the same kind of challenge.

The Great War, I believe, saw Frank in some capacity with his regiment. At the time of Art's death Frank and Annie were living at 128A, Merton Rd., South Wimbledon and records show that Frank was Captain F. V. Malins and not retired. From this point forward a great fog shrouds the Malins in the 1920s and early I930s. Out of this fog come little anecdotal glimpses of the family. Much of the fog was generated by my mother as she tried to convince me; and later my stepfather of my legitimacy. Sybil simply carved 10 years off her true age and moved her birth up to 1911. Poor Annie would have been shocked to know she bore a child at 42. Reg, in this scenario, goes from being 2 years younger than Sybil to being 8 years older. My stepfather, Jim Allan never knew my mother's true age as her marriage certificate showed her birth date as 1911. The story that she concocted had Keith as her husband being mustard gassed in the Great War. He conveniently died, leaving me without a father and her a war widow. This is what she wanted me to believe. Still, there was no way she could fly this with the family. They knew better.